[Week 2, Monday: Max]

[purrtagonist]

[just like last week, Akira approaches with his specially brewed coffee made out of stolen beans from Wildkat in hand! for the record, he made this ~super stealthily~ in the McDonald's bathroom so no one would see him at work and question his entry fee. just saying]

[he holds the drink out to Max and starts things off with a simple question]

Want to go see a movie?

Comments

[concertmaster]

Turn safe search off and let me google boobs!!

[purrtagonist]

Nope. Denied. Google ten-year-old things instead.

[HE REFUSES]

[concertmaster]

This is ageism, Joker, and I won't stand for it. You can't stop me. One of these movies has got to be R-rated.

[purrtagonist]

How about we go play with a kitten at the pet shop instead?

[distraction techniques 101]

[concertmaster]

[squiiiiiiiiiiiiints]

Yeah, okay. Acceptable. But I want to squish a pawpad.

[purrtagonist]

You can squish two paw pads.

Or however many you'd like.

[TO THE PET SHOP]

[concertmaster]

[TO THE PET SHOP!!]

Hey, can I get a BB gun while you're bribing me?

[purrtagonist]

Where am I supposed to buy a BB gun, Max?

[there are no gun shops here??]

[concertmaster]

Right, I forgot toy stores don't sell those here. Fucking Shibuya.

[://///]

[purrtagonist]

There's an airsoft gun shop in the Shibuya I know. Untouchables.

Maybe if we go there one day I'll buy you a BB gun.

[concertmaster]

Sweet.

[he did nothing to deserve that?]

I mean, spoiler, we fucking won't, but sweet.

[purrtagonist]

And here I thought you weren't allowed to give out spoilers, Max.

[concertmaster]

Your guy showing up in this UG would be fucking weird, that's not a real spoiler.

[purrtagonist]

Ah. . . well, that's fair. I prefer him alive, anyway.

[pet shop ahead, bee tee dubs]

[concertmaster]

He probably prefers himself alive too, so. Win/win.

[once there, Max makes a beeline for the snakes.

why?

because he's an enfant terrible why else does he do anything]

[purrtagonist]

[. . . . . . . well, Akira was thinking of playing with the kittens, but sure]

Snakes?

[concertmaster]

[squints]

None of these are poisonous, what's the point.

[purrtagonist]

What are you going to do with a poisonous snake, Max?

[concertmaster]

It's for later.

[????????]

[purrtagonist]

Later. . .

[suddenly dubious]

Don't tell me it's for a mission.

[concertmaster]

What? No. I got jackshit to do with those.

[how many times has he said it!!!]

It's for a personal project for when this shit ends.

[purrtagonist]

[ah. huh]

What kind of personal project?

[concertmaster]

[a long, deadpan look]

I'm starting a petting zoo.

[purrtagonist]

With a poisonous snake.

[you're full of bullshit, Max]

[concertmaster]

Yeah, what else would I specifically be looking for a poisonous snake for.