purrtagonist | [empatheias ic contact]

[oh, shit]

[oh shit]

[the silence on his end of the feed is tense as he absorbs the meaning of her words. her headmaster. . . one of the adults who had manipulated her into her death. here, in Empatheias. she isn't the only one who had never thought of that possibility. and if he weren't so focused on her right now, he might have found himself wondering what he'd do if Shido were to show up as well]

. . . did you talk to him?

[he's keeping the connection open, even as he makes his way quickly to the restaurant]

Yeah, I did.

[ She would have liked to have saved these details for their talk in person, but Pyrrha can't imagine that it makes much of a difference, either. It just helps, to air out these grievances with someone who hasn't lived the situation. (Perhaps she's just being selfish, wanting one person she can tailor the events to her strict perspective to.)

Pyrrha continues, ] I wanted to get angry, like you told me.

[ Unfortunately, she's so very... herself. ]

But, he was so confused... I couldn't leave him like that. I offered him something to eat, and answers.

[even if she is being selfish, he doesn't mind. she deserves it. after everything she's been through. . . someone needs to be fully in her corner]

[he presses his lips together in a thin line, brows furrowed. he would've gotten angry. every word out of his mouth directed at this headmaster would've been sharp and full of barbs. but Pyrrha. . . well]

You're a kind person, Pyrrha.

[he truly believes that]

You don't have to say everything you want to say to him now. You can wait.

Of course, you're correct.

[ Not that it helps. Not even Ren's presence has helped soothe this odd, jagged, profound sense of floundering. She keeps finding her foothold and losing it, again and again. Like when she knew she had to leave the city just to breathe. Like when Penny showed up.

She's agreeing with his second statement, btw. Not the bit about her being kind. ]

I thought about... [ Pyrrha changes the subject mid-sentence, for whatever reason. ] It's hard to tell myself that he didn't choose me because I was easy to manipulate when I just... let it happen again.

[ A few seemingly earnest words from Ozpin, and she crumpled.

She's pathetic. Not kind. ]

[oh, Pyrrha. . . this does seem like the sort of conversation that's better to have in person, which is why it's good that he finally finds himself standing outside the restaurant. nevertheless, he continues the conversation on the telepathic line as he pushes the door open and slips inside]

I don't think you offering him kindness and answers when he's confused about his new surroundings counts as him manipulating you again, Pyrrha.

[as long as it didn't go any deeper than that. . .]

It's. . . a complicated situation. He was someone you used to trust. One can't just move on from that at a snap of their fingers.

[ Pyrrha, mercifully off her shift now, will come meet him outside. In her hands is a giant cup of takeaway coffee, which she hands over without a word. She looks... a touch pale, even more than usual.

It's been a long week. ]

Thanks for coming by, [ she says, struggling a little to address what he said previously. ]

You know, I...

[ Yeah, she's not going to finish that sentence. ]

Edited 2017-10-09 17:15 (UTC)

[he takes the cup gratefully, offering her a smile-- both empathetic and apologetic-- as he does so. jesus. this month will probably not be a good month for her]

I'd never turn you down. Especially not at a time like this.

[his voice is quiet, but earnest. and as he tilts his head to the side and lifts the drink to his lips, he urges her to continue the aborted thought]

You. . .?

... [ She changes her mind about what she wants to say, in the end. ]

I thought so much about what he might say to me, and me to him...

[ But, none of it was like she imagined. Pyrrha can't even begin to form her lips around Ozpin's description of her character, the mechanical way in which he explained his reasoning - his apology, the sad look in his inscrutable eyes, the way he seemed to mourn her at the very table without her consent or her permission. With emotions so well magnified in Verens, she can barely pick out what she's feeling in an abundance of emotional static. It's like trying to pick out a single knot in a muddled skein. ]

I ... I thought this conversation would go differently. In my mind, I expected indifference, for him to admit I was a resource for him to exploit, and now I'm not.

[ It would have upset her in the short term, but gratified her in the long run, to know that she ground her teeth against something manipulative, that it was okay to be angry, perhaps even to flirt with hate.

Obviously, that's not what happened. ]

So, I asked him, why me? - His answer wasn't what I expected.

[he doesn't notice her sudden change in thoughts. but he does square his shoulders, a frowning turning his mouth downward]

. . . what did he say?

... [ Her expression changes a little. ] Quite a bit.

[ Pyrrha means it as a rueful sort of joke, funny to only those in the know, but her tone can't quite carry it. Her shoulders move in a tiny shrug and she starts to lead them in a walk. Some fresh air will do her some good, she thinks. ]

He said I was... that I embody hope and light, and I was everything a Huntress should be, and he chose me to inherit Amber's power -- [ oops, namedropping ] because I wouldn't use it maliciously.

[ It's a struggle not to talk in past tense. She gives up on the effort pretty quickly. She is past tense, after all.

Surreptitiously, Pyrrha swipes at her eyes. ]

How can I be angry about that?

[he follows, falling into step easily next to her. but as she talks, his expression hardens]

[those are some awfully pretty words. some glittery, fancy wrapping on an otherwise ugly package. Akira might be biased, but Pyrrha's side of the story is the only one he's heard. and he has seen adults who may have meant well in the beginning use those "good intentions" to justify their actions]

Because even if that's true, even if the reason he picked you is because he believed in you, you still died.

[and that, to him, is the most important thing here]

He can spin it how he wants to, but in the end? That path is still one someone else chose for you. [a breath] And one that led to-- well.

[she knows]

Edited (he should maybe not look sad while saying this) 2017-10-11 00:33 (UTC)

... I know.

[ She hesitates to say this next part.

A bit afraid Akira will be disappointed in her, perhaps. ]

However, I decided to ... try and forgive him. Eventually.

[ When she's able. Pyrrha is aware it may take a while, but. ]

[he isn't disappointed]

[it's like he said before, right? everyone is different. no one in the Phantom Thieves could bring themselves to fully forgive those who had hurt them-- not Kamoshida, Madarame, Kaneshiro, Shido. . . Akechi. but Akira knew, based on his interactions with his friends, that things could be way more complicated than they seemed on the surface]

I think that's pretty admirable of you.

[he replies, lifting his coffee to his lips for another sip]

And I don't think being angry and forgiveness are mutually exclusive. Just. . . don't force yourself. All right?

I know. I have no intention of forcing myself to feel anything I'm not ready for.

[ She looks down as they walk, only briefly. There isn't much wisdom to be found there. The last few days have been immensely difficult, compromising her sturdiness, making her wonder if the progress she's made isn't all just moot.

... She's tired of thinking that way, honestly. There's a lot Pyrrha is tired of, now. ]

I simply - I thought, I cannot act a way I don't feel. I am angry, but not enough to hate him or punish him for any misdeeds. [ A pause, and Pyrrha adds, ] He's like me. The night the school fell, I think ... our fates were similar.

[ For weeks now, months, Pyrrha has quietly wished for someone else - anyone else - who feels the way she does, who understands intimately what it means to have no home to go back to. It's an incredibly selfish wish, she knows, only surfacing at her most anguished moments, the times when she felt at her absolute lowest. Now that it's been granted, in fate's most perverse form, she --

She would take it all back.

There's nothing she can do for him, except this one little thing. ]

If he's suffering, I can't add to it. It's too familiar.

[there's something about Pyrrha's words that strike another chord with Akira. that make him think of another young man, just barely older than himself, who was an awful person through and through. someone who could not-- should not-- be forgiven for their crimes, and yet. . . an entire life of being unloved, of having no one there to take his hand and show him the proper way to rebel against a society that did nothing but step on him and keep him down. . . nobody deserved that kind of life. someone else Akira knew from home who was suffering]

[someone whose suffering he had also wanted to alleviate. someone he had failed to save, and that thought still haunted him, from time to time]

That's why I called you kind. [he tilts his head back, gaze sweeping the sky above] Remember what I said about finding your own path?

I think that's part of it.

Edited 2017-10-16 00:42 (UTC)

Of course, I remember.

[ She would never forget anything he said to her!

Pyrrha manages a slight smile. There's a subdued nature to it, but that's not the same as a sad thing. She had wanted his thoughts, but in this ... she feels like she made the right decision. ]

... I - I hope your newcomer day was a bit less exciting than mine!

[ She's (poorly) trying, bless her, to make the topic a bit lighter. ]

[. . . pfffft. he can't help but laugh]

A little.

[A LITTLE]

Actually, a friend of mine went home shortly before the new arrivals got here. [his own smile turns a bit wistful; he had just gotten used to having Morgana hang around in his bag again] But another good friend of mine is here now, too.

It's nice, but I've been keeping busy.

It sounds like it's been a bit of a tumult.

[ She's happy to listen to whatever is going on in his life, of course. ]

I'm sorry to hear about your friend.

Thanks.

[he sounds genuinely appreciative. and then, since it's on his mind. . . since she seemed to be having a hard time, and his new arrival day had been a whirlwind of it's own--]

I sort of feel like we could both use a vacation. [arches a brow] Why don't we take a day trip to the surface sometime?

I would love to!

[ Genuinely cheered by his propositon, but - wait for it... ]

I can't go this week, however. My boyfriend is taking me on a little getaway for a few days.

[ There's a sing-song quality to that last sentence. She's really excited! ]

[oh--]

[. . . well, all things considered? it isn't that surprising. he had, at the very least, suspected that her feelings were already preoccupied by someone else. that wanting, somewhat wistful glance at Jaune during Helisium still sticks out in his mind, even though that was well before they had become as close as they are now. well before her smile had gained the power to make his heart race, and before just being with her was enough to brighten up the rest of his day]

[that's that, Kurusu. it's a little bit of a sting, but he's accepting. he ain't a homewrecker, and honestly? he appreciates Pyrrha's friendship way too much to risk losing it thanks to some weird unrequited flutters of his heart]

Oh yeah?

[he grins at her, amused and somewhat charmed by the excitement in her tone]

Where's he taking you?

Theasthai. We had some money put away from a few tasks, so we decided to treat ourselves.

[ She's... pretty oblivious to Akira's little moment, sad to say. In fact, thinking about the week ahead of her rather than the day behind her causes her tone to perk up.

On the other hand, she's aware that this likely isn't that interesting to listen to. ]

Would you like me to bring you back something?

[it's fine. it's fine!! he'd prefer her to remain oblivious. if she found out, undoubtedly things would become awkward]

[he finishes off the last of his coffee, depositing the empty cardboard cup into a nearby trash receptacle, before he slips his hands into his pockets]

I think I'm probably the last person you should be worrying about while you're out enjoying a romantic getaway. [he says, words teasing] Just have a good time, all right? That'll be enough for me.

I'll do my best.

[ She isn't giving up on the other thing, though! ]

When I get back, we can still take a day. I haven't been to Sharnaath in a little while.

[empatheias ic contact]

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